Mentors needed to aid area youth

Kali Erickson, 10, of Sonora, receives some bowling tips from mentor, Candice Waight, of Sonora, while at Sonora Family Bowl. Maggie Beck/Union Democrat

Programs for children needing a little added guidance, or for adults who want to share their life experiences, are offered in both Calaveras and Tuolumne counties.

Mentors and their charges participate in activities ranging from reading to recreation. And just a few hours a week can make a big difference.

Experts say the simple act of reading to a child once or twice a week can profoundly aid their learning, and research shows mentored youths are also less likely to join gangs or become involved in violence, or drug or alcohol use. They also do better in school.
   

“People have a blast. The kids get so much out of it — the adults tell me they get more out of it,” said Elena Linehan, coordinator of Mentoring Works and Youth and Family Programs at the Amador-Tuolumne Community Action Agency.

“The children add an element of fun to our lives. It’s a blessing to be a positive role model and encourage wholesome values and activities,” said Dave Hole, 66, of Sonora.

Hole became a mentor after his wife, Ozell Hole, mentored a 5-year-old girl through Mentoring Works.

“I enjoy sharing ‘guy’ stuff with my child, like teaching him about tools,” Hole said of his 6-year-old protege.

Other activities the two enjoy include fishing, boating, hauling brush using the riding lawn mower, driving the tractor, working puzzles, creating art projects, baking cookies, shopping, getting haircuts, reading books together, dog walking, playing children’s card games, attending museum exhibits, participating in youth ministries at church, visiting assisted-living communities, attending movies and live theater performances, going on picnics, swimming, and lunching at Taco Bell.

Mentor Roxanne Aquiline-Drammer, 54, of Murphys, remembers being nervous when starting out.

“Somehow, the match was magical. We just have this natural bond,” she said.

Drammer said she and her 15-year-old charge meet once a week for about three hours — more than the suggested one- to two-hour commitment.

Drammer says she’s an adult friend who helps the girl make healthy life choices by being there for her as an unconditional, non-judgmental person.

In mentoring, people often find relationships they never expected.

“You really get a sense that you can make a difference in someone’s life,” Drammer said. “She’s made a difference in my life. It feels like I’m doing something productive.”

Candice Waight, 27, of East Sonora, has mentored two teenage sisters for a year and a half. The girls are being raised by a single father.

Each week, Waight and the girls do activities like ice skating or hiking. New this year: making tamales.

When the girls graduated from eighth-grade, Waight helped them with their make-up.

“It’s simple stuff ... I remember being 14,” Waight said. “I remember having friends when I was young and wouldn’t have made the best decisions without their influence. It’s kind of good knowing I’m being that person.”

Today’s youth lack “natural mentors” because of societal changes, according to organizers of the Calaveras Youth Mentoring Program.

ATCAA’s Linehan says mentored children are 27 percent less likely to use alcohol and 46 percent less likely to use drugs. They also have improved school attendance and grades.

A recent government study found mentoring is the most effective and least expensive way to make a difference in a child’s life, she said.

“We’ve had kids tell mentors it’s changed their lives,” she said. “Parents tell us it makes a difference.”

Single-parent of five, Mara Roberts, 38, of Sonora, agrees.

Roberts’ children range in ages from 4 to 15. Three have mentors and two are on the waiting list. Roberts works part-time and goes to school at Columbia College. She says she’s “totally busy.”

“There just isn’t enough of me. ... The mentoring program, they really fill in those gaps,” Roberts said.

Roberts said her children love the program, which her family has been involved in since 2005.

“I didn’t realize how many at-risk youths there are. The situation can be reconciled as they get together. I’ve watched this happen to my children and the people who’ve given us their time and love,” Roberts said.

Children are referred to mentoring programs through schools, churches, counselors and even parents, Linehan said. Mentoring Works matches children 4 to 17 with mentors.

A third of children in the program are being raised by grandparents, Linehan said. Still other children come from single-parent homes, have issues with being bullied at school, or simply don’t feel comfortable talking to their parents.

More boys need mentors than girls, so there is always a need for male mentors, Linehan said.

Mentors sign on for a one-year commitment and are thoroughly screened, Linehan said.

The Calaveras Youth Mentoring Program connects youths from grades 1 to 12 with mentors.

Mentors are screened beforehand, and then receive extensive pre-match training. That’s followed by additional training each month, weekly monitoring of the friendship and as-needed support.

“Everyone has something to give,” said Roberts. “They will be amazed at how much it can change someone’s life.”

For more information on mentoring opportunities, call ATCAA Mentoring Works at 533-1397, ext. 229, or visit www.infonettc.org, or Calaveras Youth Mentoring Program at 736-6078 or visit www.calaverasmentoring.org.